Living in Tree Houses

I suppose you could say I have a very hard time letting things go.  Not material things as much as spoken words, but it kind of feels like I've been running up stairs to get away from the pain of negative words my entire life and that is an approach that I have employed for way too long.  It turned me into someone who thought she was a nice person, but in actuality was angry and bitter and immature.

Why so angry?  Maybe because I was hungry and needed to eat a sandwich, or perhaps I was just trying to keep the heat off myself.  I talk a big game, but in all actuality I am a meek kitten.  I am working on being more conscientious about the words that come out of my mouth because you can't take words back after they come flying out. 

I'm also overly dramatic.  Chalk that up to the belief that the world is my stage and/or I have spent a majority of my life on a stage or in front of a mirror.  Not entirely a good combination because I suffer from terrible stage fright and thing I'm something special and hate myself all at once.

I think everyone has a right to his or her own opinion and unfortunately, I started ruffling some feathers by not thinking about what I was saying to others.  I get very excited to be included in a conversation and that usually ends with me dominating the conversation.  I'm sorry. I know I can't take spoken words back, but it's something that I am working on fixing through my actions.

Therefore, if you have ever been on the receiving end of my "dagger words", please accept my apologies.  I use(d) this as a defense mechanism and never realized that I was that "mean girl" in school that no one liked.  It boils down to not liking myself very much, but I'm working on changing that as well.

I'm working hard on letting go of past situations and words that have been said to me as well.  Who wants to live in the past anyway?  Life is too short.  

I hope everyone has been enjoying the fall weather.  I must admit that I'm not much into the Halloween spirit this year.  I suppose the changing seasons can do that to a person.

Change is difficult but necessary.

Trying a New Schedule

My friend Alison made me my own android self!  Get yours at androidify.com

I've been struggling with my schedule.  I have never been a big eater in my life, until I met my husband.  He still says he wants to win a food eating contest but I honestly worry about his health after the Tchoupitoulas Challenge Incident.  He taught me it was okay to enjoy food.  I think we enjoyed food a little too much in our early courtship and I had given up dancing, therefore I put on some weight.  I never felt comfortable with that because I had always been a "pretty princess ballerina", but it felt good to actually eat what I wanted and not be discouraged about eating.  After all, I had to make adjustments to my schedule with a new job and paying bills when we started dating and my natural outlet of dance was pushed to the wayside. 

The biggest trouble for me has always been eating breakfast.  That is the most important meal of the day, after all and I still struggle with that.  I was nervous to go to school and having to force something down to keep me going was so difficult.  Naturally, I just skipped breakfast.  I think it snowballed from there and naturally, controlling the food I did or did not put in my body was the only control I had for myself.

However, I am on a new plan and old habits die hard but I am most definitely eating.  I still struggle with it but I make sure I eat 3 meals a day.  I am so grateful to have a husband that is supporting me through this time of need.

I love how our New Orleans "family" always picks up after each other.  Like you would do with your kids, everyone that works in this system helps to pick up after each other.  I like to rake the leaves.  It's my way of paying it forward and cleaning up.  Right now I am focusing on reinforcing my schedule and I must admit it's a struggle, but I know that my neighbors are helping me by saying hi and waving and smiling.  I smile back and am so grateful for every day that we have in this most blessed city. 

And to anyone who was on the receiving end of my bad attitude, I am sorry.  I was really hungry and was behaving like a spoiled child.  I know I can't take those negative words back but I needed to eat a sandwich in a big way.  I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

with love,
K

Do NOT feed / DO NOT TRUST

Click Play and Watch. Then read the story...it's worth it, I promise!

Having a NICE  Smile will only get you so far in life.

When I was a freshman in high school, I made the personal decision to change from my original dance school to the PREMIERE STUDIO in my hometown.  I had grown restless of the lessons and style of dance I was learning and was looking to challenge myself farther as a dancer.  Through encouragement and financial pinching, my mom and dad enrolled me and I began studying under Mr. Neil Hess at Lone Star Ballet.

I managed to make it work, somehow, for a little while at least.  I was dancing my butt off and learning to play beautiful music and working on making more swirls in the ol' gray matter up in m' noggin. 

Listen here my little POP tarts: when you have that much Glitter! & JOY and RaInBoWs twirling and dirvishing all at once. . .

SYSTEM OVERLOAD!

I had reached my breaking point.  I was inadvertently hurting my heart because I was trying to fit into my Giselle tutu, AND be first chair in orchestra/band, AND make good grades.  Something had to give and because I had made academic and musical obligations previously, I couldn't dance Giselle, too.  (Obviously, that came later...)

Being too shy an individual is hard.  It makes you the "weird kid".  It also forces you to turn upside down in ways YOU KNOW the "cool kids" never did.

After all, they were "NINJAs IN THEIR CADDY'S!" and "THEY BET YOU LIKED IT."

The most encouraging lesson I learned from Mr. Neil Hess at Lone Star Ballet was:

* DO NOT FEED your ENEMIES.    * DO NOT TRUST your FEARS.

        

* Perseverance ALWAYS pays off  

in the end.

Bottom line:

"Losing your religion" is hard...

FALLING IN LOVE WITH IT AGAIN 

IS BEAUTIFUL. . . 

xoxo, friendly universe 

ON a Side Note: 

La Musica: Outkast, Featuring Killer Mike "Whole World" 

Looking for something KILLER to do this Halloween????

Krewe du Coeur Maudit HAS GOT IT GOING ON, YO!

October 31, 2011 

Austin, TX 

Be a part of Austin Hallowed History. 

¿Dónde está mi piña (Where is my pineapple?)

 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star', uhh...COMET...Where'd YOU Come FROM??

"People are like stained-glass windows.
They sparkle AND shine when the sun is out,
BUT when the darkness sets in,
Their true beauty is revealed  

ONLY if

there is light FROM within."

-Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1926 -)

Good News, Y'all!!!  I've been eating a few Po-boys and have gained (according to my personal scale) a whopping ONE POUND!  Whoop-Whoop!  I never thought I would  be excited about gaining weight and honestly I'm faking it till I make it at this point in "the game".  

On the other hand, I have more energy and I'm making sure I am walking in the park so I'm building some muscle back.  I just have to remember to go slowly.  Also, 'adventures in vitamins' is proving to be interesting.  I long for Flintstones Brand . . . 

Come to think of it, we never took vitamins when we were little.  I think I enjoyed those little treats at Allie's house.

Putting things in order and underwhelming yourself to achieve balance is an everyday challenge that we all face.  I feel like I have been given all the pieces to MY puzzle at the most appropriate times during MY life.  I just never had a logical explanation given to me about WHY things happened the way they did.  I found out my cardiologist of 15 years had died because my mom handed me his obituary.  Then she handed me a hankie.

This approach has turned me into a passionate, intense and slightly "psychotic" INDIVIDUAL.  

AND I'm a HOOT at cocktail parties!

The thing is that everyone seems a little afraid of me.  

"Treat her with kid gloves . . ." and "She's very sensitive" 

are both phrases that I have heard from PEOPLE my entire life.  After all, I'm delicate, RIGHT??

Ummmmm . . .

Have we met????

I was raised by a "You'll Get Endocarditis AND DIE!!!" and an 

"I'll Give You Something To Cry About!!!"  

A BRILLIANT combination, especially considering all my DELICACIES early on in my childhood.

Bottom line, I AM tough as nails and 
I spit daggers at ANYONE who Crosses ME.  

I am a stubborn Capricorn.  I have a Monkey Heart.  

Oh, and I also know how to dance my DERRIERE off.

I am so happy and grateful, GLORIOUS UNIVERSE.  You provided me New Orleans when I needed a safe place.  New Orleans has been Kev's and my official home for TWO YEARS now and I am officially overwhelmed by the gratitude I feel for finally finding OUR TRUE HOME.

God Blessed Texas

 &

God Sparkled Louisiana. 

La Musica TODAY:  Elton John Honky CAT 

©1972 Honky Château.

 GET BACK, HONKY CAT!!!

Katrina VI: Remembering and Still Rebuilding

Howdy, everyone.  I hope you all had a blessed, safe weekend and no one was too affected by Hurricane Irene.  Natural disasters, no matter the size, are a frightening occurrence and I don't think it becomes any easier as we get older.


I remember my dad throwing us kids into the bathtub with a mattress thrown over us while he crawls on the roof to see if he could spot SOMETHING.  It is difficult for me to imagine the fear they experienced when he was younger working on that dry-land cotton farm.  They didn't have those fancy Doppler radar systems like we do these days, so I'm sure they had to rely solely on the radio, and even that wasn't warning enough for some folks.


The video above is from a fantastic group of leaders here in New Orleans called Levees.Org.  Together with the founder Sandy Rosenthal, Levees.Org has collected and provided a POWER-PUNCH of data about what really happened six years ago when Katrina made landfall.  Man. Made. Disaster. 

Unveiling the levee breach plaque, the community of Gentilly has a visual reminder of the tragedy that occurred six years ago.  This particular unveiling ceremony was held on May 20, 2011.

According to the e-mail I received this morning from Sandy Rosenthal at Levees.Org, Irvin Mayfield, Jr. "played a moving rendition of "A Closer Walk With Thee" on the Elysian Trumpet, hand-built by David Monette, and dedicated to the memory of Irvin Mayfield, Sr. and all of the victims of the flooding on August 29, 2005 during Hurricane Katrina."

JUST LOOK AT THAT INSTRUMENT!  It takes my breath away, the craftsmanship.  I most definitely feel that horn in my bones!  

As was our tradition last year, this morning we are headed over to the Lower 9th Ward to participate in the Second Line to commemorate Katrina.  I'll post what went down later this afternoon.


So, Happy Monday and Go Away Hurricanes.


Period.

TODOS SOMOS CRiMiNaLeS SuaVe (We Are All Smooth Criminals)

Black and White.   

Peanut Butter and Jelly.  

Apples and Oranges.

Good and EVIL.

I'm still having a really hard time wrapping my head around the whole idea of terrorism.  

Terror.  Evil. Angry. Hate.

TERROR.

Even typing those words hurts my bones.  I don't know why, but I can't wrap my head around another human being allowing themselves to be taken over by a learned belief system so entirely that they are willing to kill themselves and anyone else that is in firing range of their rage.  Teetering on the brink of insanity, an individual can find solace in these beliefs, but I know and you know that there is still that voice inside us all (I refer to it as the Great Universe) that guides our steps when we are tangoing with karma.

I'm upset that we are still fighting this awful war.  I'm upset that the world seems to be nothing but death and destruction, pop-psychology, and celebrities.  At the end of the day, does it really matter who wore what to which premiere?  Not when our military and our allies' military are fighting for SOMEONE'S (but WHO IS someone??) incessant need for energy POWER. 

I believe in the people who show up and do their job every day.  I believe in the girl that serves me my coffee in the morning (that would be moi, y'all...), I believe in the nurses, doctors, policemen, firemen, and city officials of New Orleans, I believe in my family and friends, and I believe in the busboy that is working his way up to become the Executive Chef at Commander's Palace.

Everyone has their journey.  Everyone has his or her own tempo at which they need to dance their little dances.  But that doesn't give anyone the right to enter another individuals "PERSONAL DANCE BUBBLE" without permission and it MOST DEFINITELY does NOT give anyone the permission to cause harm.  

Period.

We get two choices in life.   

Love or Hate.  

I'm going to Continue to Love.  

(That's all I know how to do.)

**And now a question for you: Who pulls YOUR puppet STRINGS???

La Musica TODAY:  The Roots The Seed (2.0) ft. Cody ChestnuTT 

from their 2002 album Phrenology on Geffen Records.

Happy Wednesday!  

*toes, toes, toes*

A BAT in the Cave

"You are the best. You are the worst. You are average. 

Your love is a part of you. 

You try to give it away because you cannot bear its radiance, but you cannot separate it 

from yourself. 

To understand your fellow humans, you must understand why 

you give them your love. 

You must realize that hate is but a crime-ridden subdivision of love. 

You must reclaim what YOU never lost. 

You must take leave of your sanity, and yet be fully responsible for your actions." 

-Gnarls Barkley, in a letter to the legendary rock critic Lester Bangs

For your musical pleasure...Gnarls Barkley The Odd Couple "Would Be Killer"

The photo above is a picture that I took on my mom's phone this afternoon as we were running errands.  She noticed this fabulous gargoyle on the side of someone's chimney.  At first, she thought it was two gargoyles, but as we are going back to ONE right now, we quickly realized that it is in fact a single gargoyle that is holding his mask and showing his demon side.  

Just something to think about . . . we should all be more aware of the masks we wear that we "keep in a jar by the door". (Bonus points if you can NAME THAT TUNE!!!)

I personally would like my masks to look the same as what's underneath.  I'm sure everyone in their soul of souls wants that as well, except we live in this crazy society where everyone is so political and angry and it's really gotten so frightening to live in a world where all we can do is fight over power.

Power. What IS power?  Is power respect?  Do you deserve respect?  I think you do because I think I deserve respect too.  Didn't we all learn some version of the "Golden Rule" when we were growing up?? Perhaps I should have been on the short bus the whole time that I was in school because it has taken me a really long time to stop caring so much what others think about me.  I'm still working on that.  Daily.

At this particular junction in the progression of the adventures in becoming a New Orleanian, I have to say that Lady Nola knows her stuff.  She's rough and tumble and that's how I like things.  I grew up with two brothers - what do you expect??  What's even better (sometimes worse...) about her is that she has this sassy, swingy way in which she woos you to come in and sit a while.  Linger a little longer...

So I'm lingering.  I'm taking things slowly.  And that's a really good tempo for me right now. 

I think a Hubig's Pie sounds good right now....