Monday, November 8, 2010

Lonely Road


Since moving to the city, I have noticed a retreat into myself.  I believed in the beginning that moving to New Orleans would kind of be one big constant party, at least in the city's atmosphere and we would easily fall into step with the second line march about the place.  That was not the case, but I honestly don't think you fall into line anywhere completely different from where you grew up. Moving to an unknown place has always been hard for me, but for some reason the New Orleans transition feels harder.

Steeled.  I feel more steeled to the negativity.  Little country mouse moved to the big city and learned that the cats around these parts are part of the mafia.  In becoming steeled, I have retreated into the safety and comfort of my home and husband, which is fine to a degree, but somewhere I kind of let myself get completely sucked into the comfort of my home and husband.

We were chatting the other night and Kev brought to my attention that he has basically been away from me for 1/2 a year.  Meaning, over the past year, I have only spent half the year in his presence.  Wow.

I am now on a mission to go out and find myself in this city, as my own person.  Not separate from Kevin per say, just distant.  I can't continue to sit in my cave house and wait for my husband to come home.  This is not a divorce of my husband by any means, it's just a proclamation to myself to go find what I'm missing right now.  Feed my soul...

I hope you all have good ways to feed your own souls - it's important to fill your bucket regularly.

Have a fabulous week!
xoxo

1 comment:

  1. I think you will find that if you just get out in New Orleans, the fine cast of characters that have assembled there will help you find what you are searching for.

    I will give you this analogy. I ran a marathon a while back. The race itself was the easyist part of the whole thing. The hardest part was just getting out the front door to do the training runs. But having done the training, the race was a breeze.

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